This sets for you, you crusty, anachronistic, hard-to-read beauty. Oh, we were talking to our library tomes. But you might like this too. Express yourself in the way medieval cyber-scribes didnt, with ye olde emoticonnes. Capture the nuanced tones of sophisticated awe, supercilious derision, and gawdy flirtation with delightfully hand-drawn single-image missives. No need to learn the hard work of gothic ligatures or pluck a poor pheasant’s feathers to write with—we’ve already done it. Brevity is the soul of texting, and there’s no shorter way to communicate than with an emoticon. But there’s no need for the crass, vulgar emoji du jour. Say it in stylus.
How can you say no to these features?
• Absurd
• Fancy
• Economical
• Humorous
• Refined
Your iPhone will radiate self-confidence and intelligence with these fine digital accoutrements. Raise your social status with the poke of a digit. Express thyself.